So from what I’ve heard, World War VI was being waged at home between Kimmie, Dad, and Derek. Mom told me the whole story, and since she’s the neutral party (and the smartest out of all three of you, it seems), I’m going to go by what she said. And now, I’m going to tell everyone the solution to the problem. Because it’s everyone’s damned fault that this tiny thing got blown out of proportion, and it’s the fault of all parties involved because they’re too immature to use their brains every once in a while.
So, first off, Kimmie: Before I say anything else, I’m going to say this. I really don’t give two shits why you’re pissed and who you’re pissed off at. But unless you’re pissed off at me, don’t take your anger out on me. I’m stressed enough by work and school, and I really don’t need anyone bitching at me because they’re pissed at someone else. PS – Dad never “beat you”. He didn’t beat any of us. When we misbehaved, he’d spank us. It’s a form of positive punishment to discipline us to avoid doing bad things. If he really did beat us, we all would have been put in foster care a long time ago, if Mom didn’t divorce him and take us off to live as a true single mom before that.
Now, onto my message. Now, I don’t know if you think you’re not at fault or not, but I’m here to say that it’s your fault just as much as it is Dad’s fault and Derek’s fault. This is my observation, and don’t think like I’m attacking you or trying to hurt you. I’m pointing out something that you might not be aware of, so that in the future, you’ll know better. I noticed that, for all the stuff you say about Ricky and David being horrifically lazy and not pulling their weight around, you seem to be about ten times worse. Mom noticed this, and I do too, but you act like you’re exempt from doing any and all chores. You told me that the house isn’t yours, and you only sleep in your room, but you know, you also USE the bathroom, and you EAT the food and DIRTY the dishes in the kitchen. As a part of the family, and a part of the household, it’s out duty to pitch in and share the work equally. That means doing the dishes, cleaning the bathroom, and helping out with housework without complaint. If you don’t want to have to do any chores, move out of the house.
It’s not enjoyable, I understand; I’ve yet to meet anyone who actually likes cleaning their house, but it’s something that needs to be done. I know for a fact that you think Nat’s bedroom is disgusting. That’s because she doesn’t clean it. And that’s what our house (OUR house, yours too, because we all live in it) would look like if no body cleaned at all. So do your part; I mean, come on, since people have been maintaining it, when your turns comes up, it’ll be like a piece of cake. 15 minutes tops worth of work, if that much at all. It’s not that big of a deal, not to mention it helps you learn how to maintain your OWN household once you move out and go on your own. Hence why my dorm room isn’t a pigsty; I’ve learned how to maintain it by doing chores over the years.
Now, Derek… I’m pretty sure you remembered that huge fight we got into when Mom was in Spain? I’m letting you know, you did pretty much the same thing here. Look, I’ve said this before (though not in such a nice manner as I am now), but you really seriously need to stop butting into things that don’t involve you, and you need to stop acting like a parent. We have two of them already, and if you really want to boss a kid or two around, go get married and have some of your own. Kimmie hurt your feelings tonight because you butted into something that has nothing to do with you. Yes, I know that you had to do something that had to wait until after she did what she needed to do, but that’s not a good enough of a reason to butt in, ESPECIALLY when Dad is RIGHT THERE talking to her about the same thing. Also, when you get into a fight with someone, you have the unfortunate habit of being ridiculously spiteful, just like Dad (I thought I should point that out, you hypocrite). If you’re going to end up being spiteful and horrendously immature to the point where it makes me want to hang myself, you might as well do the mature thing and walk away from it. Better yet, don’t freakin’ say anything at all, unless you’re prepared to get hurt. In all honestly, after I heard what had happened, you deserved it, because you had no place to say anything at all.
Finally, Dad: I don’t know why you haven’t realized it, but when arguing with us kids, reverting yourself to a 10 year old never gets anything done. The big problem with you is that you have next to no patience whatsoever. And you don’t know how to keep your temper in check AT ALL. Especially when dealing with Kimmie. It’s almost like you’re convinced she’s a bad kid, and so you don’t bother having and patience with her. You need to stop letting her set you off, and you need to stop acting like she’s like a delinquent. When I was talking to you on Skype, at times you were doing that “I’m the victim” thing again. That’s something else you really seriously need to take care of as well. And, when you’re planning chores out, don’t keep Kimmie out of it. Just keep going under the assumption that she’ll do her part too. Because if you keep excluding her, then essentially you’re giving her what she wants: exemption from doing something that she should be required to do. Give me time (and Mom too if she’s going to talk to Kimmie). We’re working to help Kimmie with more important things. Don’t forget that she has some very serious issues that she needs to deal with. And it’s those issues that contribute to her being bratty and bitchy. Just keep it in mind.
One more thing; I don’t really know if you’ve figured it out, but did you ever notice that out of everyone in the family, Kimmie only treats Mom and I well? She gets on all the guy’s cases, not just you, but David and Ricky and Derek. Did you ever stop to think about why she seems to be holding a grudge against the males of the family? It’s because you don’t apologize sincerely. Or maybe you think you do, but to everyone else, you really don’t. Remember in my rants against you on here when I said that you never mean it when you’re sorry? That’s how Kimmie feels about your apology for what happened during the Filor-bitch episode. She feels like you didn’t mean it when you said sorry, she feels like you don’t care about her enough to care that what you did really hurt her, and she feels like you don’t care that you hurt her the way you did. If you want her to stop treating you so horribly (because you’re ALWAYS bitching about this to me), besides the fact that you need to STOP SNARLING the second you think someone’s done something wrong, but you have to apologize to her like you MEAN IT. Apologize to her like you’re about to die and that apology is the only thing that matters. And after that, you need to change how you deal with Kimmie. Have you figured out that yelling at her and snapping at her for every little thing accomplishes nothing? Probably not, which is why I’m telling you this. Instead of losing your patience with her every two damn seconds, when you’re confronting her, you need to stop, take a deep breath or five, and then talk to her in a calm and patient manner. You need to be more gentle with her instead of acting like she’s a criminal all the time. And don’t you dare bullshit and say that you do that already, because you sure as hell DON’T do that with anyone, except Mom. Kimmie’s very emotionally delicate, even though she hides it by being bitchy all the time. It doesn’t take much to hurt her (she shows it by being bitchy), especially if you simply do what Filor and everyone, including you, did, which was convince her that she’s a horrible person with no hope of changing. Think about that for a good chunk of time, and let it sink into that half-working brain of yours.
You need to understand this before you can make a sincere apology or help change the way you deal with her. You need to acknowledge that what happened when she was in 3rd grade wasn’t her fault, and the way she behaves now is partially your fault, like it is Mom’s, like it is Derek’s, and like it is the teachers and the teacher’s aides, and particularly Filor-bitch. Mom’s apologized to Kimmie, and she apologized from the bottom of her heart because she realized just how much she had hurt Kimmie. If you want Kimmie to literally stop hating her, you need to do the same thing Mom did. You need to it ten-fold because you were the most harsh on her out of the family. So think about that.
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