All About G

You would think, since my 20th birthday was this past Saturday, and today is Thanksgiving (I write this 7 minutes past midnight) that I would have at least some thing to tell you guys. I mean, it’s been nearly a month (and I’m really sorry for not keeping you all posted).

My 20th birthday was spent upstairs fucking around on Kimmie’s computer, and eating birthday pie (because I can’t stand the texture of cake). Presents couldn’t be afforded (though I got a candy bar from Kas, so I guess it’s something), though I suppose I shouldn’t have expected anything; after all, Mom told me to not expect anything come Christmas, a month later.

I got paid on Wednesday (yesterday, technically), and half of it went to my credit card, a shirt, and some neccesities. On Friday, I hope to get a new pair of boots, but I’m not really expecting much there either because I have approximately $40 in my account, and unless the boots I saw were discounted further, I won’t be able to afford them, though I need a new pair.

I helped Mom with baking a couple of pies just now. Two pumpkin and an apple. I think I might be helping with the turkey, but I don’t know. I suppose I ought to be feeling that ol’ holiday cheer, like I do every year, but I just don’t feel anything.

… Check that. I feel completely and totally furious because I deleted the texts I sent myself and INTENDED to fucking save. It figures. I just don’t fucking care anymore.

Hopefully I’ll be in a better mood when I wake up in the morning.

I suppose the only good new that comes out of this post is I’m a year loser to death. Whoopie. I’d wish you a Happy Thanksgiving, but it wouldn’t be coming from the heart. So I’ll try to update tomorrow after the festivities are over. I just hope I won’t be feeling so shitty by then. In the meantime, I’m going to attempt to remember that fucking text I deleted (I can’t even begin to tell you how pissed off I am about that).

Comments (1) Nov 26 2009

I’m tired. Too tired to give you a real update.

My feet hurt, my knees hurt. I’m so tired I almost feel like I’m high. My body just feels like a sack of lead. My head feels like it weighs a ton. My eyes feel like they’re bloodshot; they probably look bloodshot too.

My head is buzzing like it usually does when I’m depressed. My eyes keep unfocusing. And I’m not even done with all the shit I need to do.

I’m tired. I’m sad. I don’t want to be here anymore. I just want to go home where I can rest. Rest and not have to worry about turning in this paper on time, or finishing those four assignments before going to work, or covering someone’s shifts without taking away too much homework time, or gaining the motivation to do any of this stuff, or budgeting my time so that I have time in the first place.

I don’t really care that I have about two weeks left. I’m ready to be done and away from here. I want to come home.

Comments (1) Apr 25 2009

I meant to post this the same day as my heads up post, but I was too tired to.

I’ve been too tired to feel like doing much of anything. I’ve barely got the motivation to do any work (and ironically, I still faithfully attend each class). I feel like I haven’t had a real break since the summer after I graduated. And I suppose that is true; there was my 07-08 academic year, and the summer between freshman and sophomore year I took classes all the way until late July. I didn’t do anything school related for only a month, and then I came back for my 2nd year here. Three weeks is a break, but three months honestly makes all the difference.

I know spring break is only, what, 2 days away and all, but I feel like I’m not going to be able to really catch up on rest until summer. Hopefully I won’t be too busy. This next week, I’ll probably be doing a lot of snoozing… Of course, knowing how Kasedy likes to spend every waking minute with me, or at least, as much as she can (even though we both agreed that we’re drifting apart), I have the feeling I won’t be getting as much sleep as I expect to (and that may be a better thing, who knows).

Comments (0) Mar 04 2009

For gawd’s sake, get someone to teach you how to use your blog. What the heck is the point of having a blog if you never update it. That’s like having a boyfriend or girlfriend that you don’t hang out with or call at all. It’s like having a box of ice cream in your fridge without ever eating it. It’s a waste of time and space to have it.

And besides, I’m sure you’ve got plenty to say. So hurry up and learn how to use it!

Comments (3) Jan 21 2009